Sunday, February 25, 2007

What did you watch when you were a kid? Barney? Beavis and Butthead? MTV?

I just asked my sister 'What would you say if I read every word in the libary?' She didn't respond (verbally), so I continued. 'Every word? That's not infinity!'

So I continued, now singing:

What would you say if I counted every note I ever played?
Every note?
That's not infinity!
What would you say if I danced more steps than anyone had ever danced before?
No, no, no. That's not infinity!
Okay, so you never saw Square One TV (and even if you did, you wouldn't go up to people and start reciting lyrics from it twenty years later), and they're too lame to release it on DVD, but sexy people have posted it online. YouTube has stuff from Square One TV. It tends to be poor quality taken from old VHS tapes, but who cares? It's Square One TV, man! 321 Contact! Classic Sesame Street! Maybe even some Newton's Apple? I must go check!

Copyvios are immoral. Not releasing this stuff, though, constitutes cruel (though usual) punishment. I DEMAND SQUARE ONE TV!

'Infinity' was /The Jets/, by the way, but I doubt you ever saw /it/ on MTV.

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

This morning I noticed that my mom had put a green avocado in the refrigerator. So with my sister tsk-tsking, I explained that doing so is ever so wrong.

I'm Alton Brown's disciple.